My Longest Blog Ever

There are different seasons in each of our lives. The bible tells us this in Ecclesiastes 3. In recent weeks, I have been going through a time of losing, something common in all of our lives. I lost my phone and my house/car keys in the matter of 7 days (that’s a week!); in between, I failed my Public Law paper. As if material loss is not ‘bad enough’, in some sense I lost my ego and my pride, in which are both fitting and good for heaven’s sake. I shall explain more on this.

For a great part of my life, I have always thought that I have life all under control. I guess the foolishness of thinking that I have a higher “I.Q.” than some of the people around me has gotten the better of me. As a result of my pride, the malady of crowning myself as lord of my own life come in to consume me, which is both my sin and deceit of the enemy. Although I always appear to be humble (looks can deceive!), parts of me are not. But thank to the Lord God, who is forever faithful and good, I manage to identify and thus deal with my lack of trust in Him. The events that had taken place during the past week or so have demonstrated that I am a human prone to mistakes and doomed for destruction. It is not just the losing of belongings, but also the lose of self-belonging. Indeed, not just the people around me who are disappointed with me, but most of all the self-disappointment that often comes in and push me off the cliffs into the pit. I was disappointed of this Nicholas Hor, whom I always thought was so reliable would lose such things as his “most-precious” Motorola V878, or his aunt’s house and car keys in a matter of weeks. Equally disappointing was the failure of the law paper that always thought so confidently that I could be able to pass. Lo and behold, it struck me like lightning, and in case you hadn’t realized, it struck me three times, in the same spot – the heart.

Since the beginning of history, man had never not been a disappointment, whether to themselves, to someone else, or to God. Yet, if we allow it, by God’s grace, and through Jesus Christ His only Son, we have hope in the midst of hopelessness; and light in the midst of darkness. “For all have sinned and fallen short of God’s glory…” and “the wages of sin is death…” but “the free gift of God is eternal life through Christ Jesus”. And as I would put it- for all have been hopeless but God is here(!) to give us hope. As I walked into God’s sanctuary this morning, I begin to realize all His mercies and the mystery of His Grace. Whether my recent ordeal was from God, satan or man, God allowed it to happen (as what the beloved Dr Tan Soo Inn had shared) for His divine purposes. And if I shall add, God allows problems and troubles to happen to His people because He loves them, and somehow or rather, (and I boldly claim) brings back hope. So very often, we are only reminded of God’s grace in our troubles, not in our happy moments- a truth that Moses boldly claimed, “…When you have eaten your fill in this land, be careful not to forget the Lord…” (Deuteronomy 6:11-12). Although I always have the knowledge of being humility, as I entered His sanctuary, humility came as knowledge in the heart, not in the head. God loves the humble, the proud He will humble. “Pride leads to disgrace, but with humility comes wisdom.” (Proverbs 11:2)

The Lord our God is the King of kings and Lord of lords. He is the Lord of all creation, the Mighty One of Israel. He is the Master of our lives and the Banner of our hearts. Without humility, no one can truly say this. This is why God was so delighted with the trio of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob (a question I have been pondering for some time now. Amen! God answers!). Because of Abraham’s humility, he trusted in God and willingly sacrificed Isaac. Because of Isaac’s humility, he pleaded with God for childless Rebekah. Because of Jacob’s humility, he refused to release God until God blessed him (credit to Joram for his God-revealed wisdom). And hence, God had never been ashamed to call Himself “the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob. Someone once said, “humility” comes from the word “human”. I took a search through Oxford and found that much more real and truthfully, the word came from “humble”, and “humble” actually relates more to the word “humus”, in which know, is soil. The Word of God agrees and tells us that we were made from the “dust of the earth” (Genesis 2:7). Surely, to be humble is to know that we are but creation of God, coming from the dust, and would still only be dust if it was not for God, who breathed into us the breathed of life. This day I pray that God will continue to take me through this journey of humility, knowing more about His awesomeness and His grace, which is sufficient for me. I echo the words of David, “The one thing I ask of the Lord- the thing I seek the most- is to live in the house of the Lord all the days of my life, delighting in the Lord’s perfections and meditating in His Temple.” (Psalm 27:4)

In Your awesome presence, O Lord, there is fullness of joy. Amen

And so was the testimony of God’s hope-giving. But yet, the most important lesson I learnt for the past few days especially, was LOVE. Throughout my so-called ‘great trials’, many of the brothers and sisters around me continuous helped me and encouraged me. Indeed I am touched by their acts of love: my dear sister Joyce who fetched me around to find my keys and fetched me home when the search failed, brother Boon Yee who continuously helped me and fetched me, Sharon who prayed for me, and many more of my family’s (both at home and in church) encouragements. Undoubtedly, they are true followers of Christ for those who belong to Christ will love their brother… The Holy Spirit in me also convicts me that since the day is near, I really should begin to love. I confess that I have not loved enough previously and by the grace of God I shall pursue the God-given purpose of life:

Love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, and with all your strength; and love your neighbour as yourself.

There are three things that will endure – faith, hope and love – and the greatest of these is love. (1 Corinthians 13:13)

God is good and His love endures forever. I write this whole blog more to convict myself than anybody else. Indeed, I need to be reminded of His faithfulness and His love.

If you are reading this:

To God, who alone is wise, be the glory forever through Jesus Christ, Amen.